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Name:: Kirsti
Email:: mail@kirstio.com
Web_site:: www.kirstio.com
Date:: 27/12/2005

Message

Welcome to all noncommercial visitors. Feel free to post a message in your language "préferée". Velkommen til ny gjestebok!

Name:: Susana Noronha
Email:: susananoronha@yahoo.com
Web_site:
Date:: 3 January 2006

Message

I' ve been following your art for about one year or more. I'm doing a research on cancer art... and that was the process that lead me to your site. In 2003 I almost lost my mother to cancer and in 2005 the year was of doubt to me because I had a node in my breast and a biopsy followed. How many more are to be touched and ravaged by this disease? My life project is to show and help transform and fight the causes and consequences of cancer. I'm a 30 year old anthropologist doing a master on sociology... but my goal is to become an activist through words... and your images inspire and find ressonance in the words I have to write in order to touch the world... at least the little world I live in... Portugal Your work is overwelming and powerfull. Some say we become immortal in the objects we leave behind... but all we want is to live enough to become immortal in the hearts of the ones we love... You have touched my heart Kirsti!I am gratefull to be able to see your artwork and the expressions of the woman you are!

Name:: Jan Holmes
Email:: jannpaul@austarnet.com.au
Web_site:
Date:: 9th Dec 06

Message

Hi Kirsti, I Have just finished reading your story and I felt the need to write and say hello and wish you well. I hope this finds you in less pain and discomfort, since you have stopped taking the Aromasin. I was diagnosed with bone mets in march 2004 and although I did have three days of radiation to my rib left hip and spine I have refused to have chemotherapy. I have taken Femara for 18mths but the debilitating arthritis was stopping from having quality of life, I could no longer paint and my art is important to me. Even to dry my self after a shower was so painful. it has been 6 weeks since I stopped taking it and my movement has increased back to almost normal. The Oncologist put me onto Aromasin. I took it for a week vomited every day and was so lethargic I didn't want to get out of bed so I made the decision to go it alone and just go with my alternative stuff. I started drinking essiac tea, just this past weekend, so can't tell you yet how that will go, but I am really hopeful. I really just wanted to let you know that you are not alone, there are many of us who refuse to go down the toxic road with chemo, knowing that we will spend the last of our days with our head in the toilet and in terrible pain, not just from the cancer but the awful side effects of the drugs they give us. I have become a real synic I look at this now as a cancer industry and know that if they found a cure tomorrow, whole ecconomies would go bankrupt!! I wish you all the very best, do what you feel is best for you, it's a scary time I know how you feel, enjoy your surroundings you are in such a beautiful part of the world. I am in a tiny town of only 30 people in central NSW Australia, but it is peaceful and that is important. Take care, you are in my thoughts, much love Jan

Name:: Cathy in L.A.
Email:: ogpanfilo2@aol.com
Web_site:: none
Date:: january 6th, 2006

Message

dear Kirsti, I just finished writing you an e-mail in reply to yours (bcmets). I then proceeded to go to your website. I am in awe at the beauty of your work!!! The colors, the feelings expressed, the composition! Thank you for showing it! I also read your bcmets story. You are a very tenacious and courageous woman. My mets are in the abdominal wall, just under the right breast. Had no surgery (I was told it was too late to make any difference in outcome...) I just pray that a cure be found. Your courage is inspirational to me. Thank you.

Name:: Simon Parr
Email:: production@thechangingtimes.co.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 9/1/01

Message

I was searching for some calligraphy and came across your site. You seem interesting. I was going to download the illustated letter for something without asking but your self-honesty shamed me a bit. Im an artist and have just finished an MA in psychotherapy and im wondering what to do now. I seem to grapple with similar emotional issues to you. I also analyse faces for corporate events as well as handwriting. Im in London and dont know why im bothering with this message.

Name:: Shelley
Email:: weaken@look.ca
Web_site:
Date:: Jan. 2006

Message

Hi Kristi, I found your story after searching info on ILC, I was diagnosed Jul/05. Thank you for sharing your story. Shelley

Name:: Carol Corke
Email:: carolcorke@canyonridgesprings.com
Web_site:: http://lookinanlistenin.statesmanblogs.com/
Date:: 17/01/06

Message

Mystic bear, cloaked in Iridescence, Yours colors splash wonderment upon the canvass of my mind. Sweet muse, dream sister, Ever friend and always inspiration; How can I with words alone capture the quick silver gratitude cascading in my heart? In shades of purple, plum, and persimmon, theatrically draped by paisley scarf I wave my fan of bone and feather knowing you will see; In your pen infused delirium of creation You'll feel the nudge of silly socks, tapping phantom cadence on your ancient floors. Thank you. Thank you thank you say these wild wandering wishes these heartfelt sentiments you arouse. Precious friend... Thank you Your own FUZZ

Name:: J Saldanha
Email:: tzzk02@yahoo.com
Web_site:
Date:: 19 January 2006

Message

Saw your delightful website. It is a real pleasure to see such beautiful calligraphy. I hope you will add to your site soon.

Name:: Pam
Email:: pamhastings@cox.net
Web_site:
Date:: 24 Jan 06

Message

I read your story. You are a brave woman. I have to say I believe in God and pray he has made your life easier. I too have been diagnosed with breast cancer. I am 54, heavy breasted and wanted a reduction, not cancer and removal. I know for my life I need to go through the surgery and the whatever else they decide my treatment plan will be. Currrently, I know of one infiltrating Lobular Carcinoma 2cm tumor from ultrasound with something called signet ring variant. Some days I'm positive others I don't want to even get up to look at the world that seems to keep going about its business, rightfully so. I cannot tell my family I'm afraid because they are having trouble dealing with the cancer thing too. I hate it. I want to go back to just being me, parcticing my martial arts to the best of my ability, bedamned the fact that I'm not that good. I started when I was 51 years old. I felt good for the first time in years. Now I'm consumed by fear and how much time I have left. Negative yes, surgery is tomorrow 25 Jan 06. In my heart I believe I will be ok, I just don't know how I will feel mentally. Thank you for your honesty and letting me express my frustration and anger toward caner. My friend has plasma/myeloma cancer and it doesn't look very good for her. She is a good person. None of us were dealt a very good hand. They are treating her with some new technology. Five years ago, I guess they just let you die. The treatments are very difficult and hard on her, but she seems to battling well. I wish you well and to say pain free. I like your paintings. Pam

Name:: Carrie
Email:: cpatrick4@woh.rr.com
Web_site:
Date:: 1/24/06

Message

Kirsti, Thank you so much for sharing your journey, your art and the poem moved me so. I have been by my sisters side during her journey these past 9 months I am so very new in my own journey not yet diagnosed waiting for test results from a fine needle aspiration. I just wanted to say thank you. Carrie

Name:: Alexandra
Email:: 450283@student.hin.no
Web_site:
Date:: 26.01.2006

Message

Heihei Ville bare si at jeg liker bildene dine =) falt spesielt foe det med den jenta med fiolinen. Nydelig!! Fant adressen til siden din på Kari bremnes sin hjemmeside der du hadde skrevet en hilsen. Håper det går bra med deg!! Hilsen Alexandra, student i Nordnorge

Name:: susan bc canada
Email:: sueholm@uniserve.com
Web_site:
Date:: Feb 4/06

Message

Kirsti, Hi, Susan from bcmets. I often wonder how you are and hope you might let me know what is happening with you. I know you were suffering dreadful sideffects, so I wonder whether you gave up on the hormonals. Please let me know how you are doing and if there is anything I can do to help. Did you check out all the pictures at http://www.picturetrail.com put bcbeauties in the top right field and you will see lots of the women from bcmets. Drop me a line, OK? Susan H

Name:: Paula Phipps
Email:: phippsstdspec@earthlink.net OR glp043@verizon.net
Web_site:
Date:: 6-February-06

Message

Hello Kirsta! I found your website on breastcancer.org. I have been meaning to contact you for some time now but just never did it. Well today is my day to do it! I too have ILC but am lucky so far in the fact that it has not metastisized (as far as I know). Mine was dx'd less than a year ago and I've just started Arimidex. My heart goes out to you with all the shit you are having to go through. Gentle hugs to you. My reason for wanting to get this message to you is to let you know how inspiring your paintings have been to me. Some are very haunting in an etheral, serene way....if that makes sense! I am VERY intrigued by your black butterflies. Can you share with me what significance they have to you? The reason I ask is because in 1986 my younger brother died at age 34. When he died, I literally felt as though my soul was ripped from my heart. The grief was paralyzing. That next summer after he died I was in deep despair and feeling so alone and missing him terribly (grief does that sometimes). I was outside silently pleading that he would somehow let me know that he was around in spirit. To my totally complete surprise (not an accurate word for such a breath-taking experience, but the best I can come up with at this time) a black butterfly with blue-tipped wings whisped by me. I was awed at its beauty, as I had NEVER seen a black butterfly before. Since that time I have been blessed to have it whisp past me on 2 more occassions. When it appeared the 1st time I felt peaceful, I felt like it was a sign that my brother was letting me know that he is around me....like a guardian angel so to speak. I only wish the black butterfly would hang out a little bit longer so that I may drink in it's beauty with my eyes. I want to thank you for sharing your creativity via your website and I will visit it frequently and take in the beauty of your heart-felt work. I do hope this message finds you and that you are feeling better. Good Karma is being sent your way from me as are my prayers. Peace, Paula

Name:: Walter Asbe
Email:: ewasbe@peoplepc.com
Web_site:
Date:: Feb 7 2006

Message

Dear Kristi I am one of several People in the Idaho-Washington concert choral, that have family roots to Norway. I have received word that you have cancer. Trust your doctors, pray and get well soon, our good wishes are with you. I have enjoyed your painting that we have used on posters for our concerts. I have had cancer, matastic melignant melenoma and went through two bad years but that was twelve years ago, I am free of cancer now. best wishes Walt

Name:: Brødrene Hansen ANS
Email:: walle@Hansen.net
Web_site:
Date:: 8.2.2006

Message

Vi driver et lite gårdselskap som skal leie ut til Gudrun Sjøden, som åpner sin første norske butikk her i Nedre Slottsgate 15 nær Steen & Strøm i Oslo. Ditt navn poppet opp da jeg søkte på Sjøden. Jeg synes din kunst er særpreget og utrolig bra. Er du kunde av Sjøden, kan åpningen av butikken ha interesse for deg som kunstner? Åpningen blir ca 1. august i år. Knut Walle-Hansen

Name:: Moira
Email:: mjmart123@aol.com
Web_site:: www.frenchhouseparty.co.uk
Date:: 08/02/06

Message

Hi Kirsti, I was so sorry to hear that you're having problems with your health again, but Julie keeps me informed and my last health bulletin on you sounded very positive. I really hope that's the case. I'm going to be over in Pexiora from Sunday to Tuesday this week and I wondered whether it would be possible to come over and look at some of your paintings? I've been wanting to buy another ever since I got the other two, so I'd love to come and have a private viewing. Is that possible? Are you up to it? My best wishes, Moira

Name:: Nicola Stewart
Email:: VaMoonRise@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: February 12, 2006

Message

Dear Kirsti, Your battle with breast cancer really touched home with me. I am now 37 years old, I was diagnosed in March of 2004 with DCIS. I had a lumpectomy done to remove microcalcifications. They went in a second time a month later to recheck the margins because it was so close to being considered invasive, but the second surgery came back clean. They called it stage "0", I went through eight weeks of radiation and was having checkups and mammograms done every 6 months. I thought I was so blessed to have caught it early, I had lost my Mother to BC in 1995 and I felt sure that I would not suffer her same fate. On December 1, 2005 I started with excruciating pain in my right side, I knew it wasn't my appendix as I had that out as a child. I went to my family doctor and he did a ultra sound and said that it was my gall bladder. I went in for surgery to have it removed and when they went in they found extensive cancer spread throughout my liver in both the right and left lobes. I was in such shock, how could this happen? How did a noninvasive early stage BC metastasize? Through further testing and scans we discovered that I am HER2/neu positive with mets to the liver and spine. No one has yet been able to explain to me how this happened, how I went from stage "0" to stage "4" in just a year and a half. I am currently on a clinical trial, I am the first person in the USA to be on this trial. I am receiving chemotherapy once a week that consists of Herceptin, Taxol and Lapatinib. I also get Zometa a bone strengthener once a month. I have lost all of my hair and have moderate side effects, mostly fatigue, diarrhea and body aches. I had my first CT scan of the chest, abdomen and pelvic this past Friday, I am waiting on the results that should be back tomorrow. I am hoping that it will show that I am responding to treatment. I hate this disease and what it does to a persons body and mind, it is a roller coaster that you can never get off. If my cancer does not respond to this first course of treatments I too may choose quality of life over quanity of life. This horrible disease may take my body but it will never take my spirit. I too love to paint on canvas, I am a self taught artist. I paint in acrylic mostly, abstract still life and mixed media. I absolutely love your paintings, they are so raw and alive. I haven't been painting since I started chemo but now that I have seen and read your story I am inspired to start again. I truly hope that you are feeling better and well enough to continue painting and doing the things that you love. You are a beautiful woman that I can tell holds an abundance of inner strength, I wish you all of the very best. Thank you so much for sharing your story and your beautiful art work that truly is a mirror into your soul. Big Hugs, Nicola Stewart

Name:: Annapoorna
Email:: annapoorna_atloori@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: Feb 18th 2006

Message

The pictures are awesome..they are just so beautiful...and the color combinations are so good..they captured dark moments so well...brilliant ..i should say... I wish somday i could draw soemthing similar to your paintings...you are really a great artist..and i really mean it...

Name:: Annapoorna
Email:: annapoorna_atloori@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: Feb 18th 2006

Message

Name:: Rachel Howard
Email:: raaaach_is@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 26/2

Message

Hey, my name is rachel and im doing an art assignment on social commenting and i especially loved your art. Could you write back and tell me more about yourself, you inspiration and your work. Thankyou so much! rachel

Name:: Lesley
Email:: lesley@hathorns.net
Web_site:: www.learnlearning.com
Date:: Feb 27, 2006

Message

I too am struggling with breast cancer. Stage III was my diagnosis. My treatment has just ended and the fear overwhelms me. Thank you for sharing your story of courage. I send all my warmest wishes.

Name:: Shannon McQueen
Email:: smcqueen@magma-da.com
Web_site:: none
Date:: March 9,2006

Message

Hi Kirsti, My name is Shannon McQueen and I was diagnosed with metastatic lobular carcinoma of the breast today. It's stage IV. I have nodular lesions all over my abdomen.shoulders, lower back, hips and under my left eyelid. Like you I had a mammogram of my left breast in 2001 which came back as fibrocystic changes--no big deal. About 2 years ago I started getting nodular lumps on my hips and then one showed up on my shoulder. Last April I had another CT scan done of the shoulder and, again--benign fatty tumor, no big deal. Actually, I had gone to my opthalmologist for the swelling of my lower left eyelid which started me on this journey. I was referred to a specialist plastic surgeon who thought it was a fatty cyst. 8 weeks later he decided that it had grown too big and sent me for a CT scan. The CT showed what, in medicine, is blandly called an "incidental finding"--namely a tumor in the brain. I saw a dermatologist 10 days ago who biopsied my shoulder and felt certain that it was an inflammatory autoimmune issue. I went back for the pathologists report today and finally found out what it is. The most difficult part was telling my sister and elderly parents this afternoon. Thank you for documenting your journey. Statistics, however good they sound, don't really mean much and your web site gave me some idea of what my own personal journey may be. I have remained calm for one piece of bad news after the next and have still not cried. I don't see the point. Things are what they are and I just have to take one step at a time with equanimity and courage. The only alternative seems to curl up in a ball. If you have any words of wisdom I would be glad to hear them. Thank you again,Shannon

Name:: Sonia Holat
Email:: scon24@hotmail.com
Web_site:: personal gallery "i dream black butterflies"
Date:: march 12/2006

Message

hello, i am facinated by your art! I have a question about your painting " i dream black butterflies". Can u explain your meaning of this painting?? YOur feelings while you painted it and the reason behind your choice of colors?? thanks Sonia Holat

Name:: Moira
Email:: Moihill2aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: 3-15-06

Message

It is my birthday and I am feeling blessed to be here- was checking some information about my own situation and found your website. You are very talented and brave to share your feelings on your journey-it helps. thankyou and bless you.

Name:: Moira
Email:: Moihill@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: 3-15-06

Message

Name:: Mary Lou Blackledge-Kortz
Email:: mlbkortz@comcast.net
Web_site:: www.exkards.com
Date:: March 15, 2006

Message

chere Kirsti, I have just found your incredible website. My mother has just been diagnosed with invasive lobular carcinoma. She is scheduled either for a simple mastectomy or a lumpectomy this coming Monday. In searching for information on this, I found you! Your account of your path brought tears to my eyes and also great respect for you. I will be sending very vital positive and healing prayer your way. I, too, am an artist, and used to live in Strasbourg, France. I live in my native Colorado now, and have started cartooning. I have begun a humorous greeting card line for women with a friend of mine who is very funny. I will be checking in with you. Mary Lou

Name:: Gabi
Email:: soldbygabi@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: 03/17/2006

Message

I found your article just thru a search engine. I was looking for articles relating to the type of breast cancer I have been diagnosed with. Which you the same as yours was, only smaller. I had a lumpectomy for "Christmas" and today just finished my 7 weeks of radiation. I did not choose chemo, or tamoxifen. I whole heartedly understand your decision when you went off of your meds. To me, the quality of life is more important than the quantity. I also understand when you say you believed your case was boring to the doctors. There's no compassion in that world. It's very lonely. I'm glad my radiation is over. We'll see what's next. I'm ready for some smooth coasting for a while. But that never seems to be my case. The best of luck to you my friend!

Name:: Jeanne Tabor
Email:: ejtabor@comcast.net
Web_site:
Date:: 20 March 2006

Message

Gentle Hugs Kirsti! Your site is wonderful. The artwork thriling. Your story touched my heart. I too made the 'controversial decision' to remove my right breast. I was diagnosed with invasive tubular carcinoma in left breast on Aug 30, 2006. I also had suspicious areas on the right, they actually wanted me to wait 6 mths to 1 year to have it mammogramed again. I said no, take them both off. I was actually right on the mark to have them remove the right breast as well. I had 2 tumors in it and it was diagnosed as DCIS. Doctors and technology are sometimes not our best friends. This same area on my left breast was there and a surgeon saw it but did not order a biopsy. It said it was probably benign. I am so furious this was in my left breast since 1996 and no one would biopsy the area. I don't mean to sound as though I am complaining, I am really grateful and blessed that I walked away with only an Rx for tamoxifen for 5 years, no rad or chemo was needed (so they say??) I really do not think they really know. I am waiting for my Pathology report from Magee Women's Hospital in Pittsburgh, PA. I suppose I will freak out when I read what it says, but I do not trust the medical community too much now. I truly wish you the best. No one knows what we have been through except us. God Bless you and your family. Jeanne Tabor

Name:: Gabriel Asuncion
Email:: gabrielasuncion@yahoo.com
Web_site:: none in particular
Date:: '06-3-29

Message

hello. i've read all the messages from your site. it gave me the hope that there's more to cancer and there's still light to see. my mom has been diagnosed with bone mets 1 month ago. the whole family was very sad...you see, my mother already had passed by breast cancer and survived it. she now has another cancer-related decease which i totally abhor and hate. i hate cancer. i cant imagine what would happen to me and my sister, as well as my dad if she were not here. but i still hope that there's a big chance of survival here. pls. pray for her... im asking all those people out there, to please grant the simple request of a 13 year-old boy...i cant live w/out my mom... mother?...she's already suffered a lot. her medicine,femara cost so much! now that she's got a new decease, those damn old boxes of costly medicine are now useless because the doctor prescribed a new one. now, were selling the excess medicines at e-bay for some added cash. pls, if you live in the philippines, pls. drop by e-bay and go to the health care section. you'll find there a sale for "femara".but f not, i guess the only way to help is to pls. pray for her. it would really mean a lot if you guys did so.and to all those cancer patients out there, lighten up! there's light after a dark tunnel.a drizzle after the drought.comfort after a plague, and some stories to share after a challenge. again, thank you and God bless!

Name:: Eilert Ottem
Email:: eilert.ottem@macpoint.no
Web_site:
Date:: April 6, 2006

Message

Hold ut, søstera mi! In English. Hang in there, sister of mine!

Name:: incognito
Email:: incognito@net.com
Web_site:
Date:: 14.april

Message

Thank you for your insight of suicidal. I am sorry to hear of your cancer. Will light a candle for you when in church. I was ready to do the same thing your brother did, but after reading your webpage, I have called and made an appointment for theraphy. I belive I will choose life, after all I do have family, and I can not put then thrugh this. I must write down my thoughts, I hope you can bare with me for that. I do no have anyone else at the moment to turn to. I live in southern europe, but was born and raised in scandinavia. Ever since childhood I have felt like a loner, and the best company have been myself. I do not hold friends, and never have. I do not know how to interact with other people, and one way or another I will mess things up or they will. Friends come and go. First time I actually thought of ending it all I was only 9 years old. 9 years old, but with the mind of an old man. Story of my life, I have never been a child, I have always been old. Except now I am old, but with a child inside, so to say. 11 years ago I met my wife, and I got sunshine in my life. I fell madly in love, and the best part was that she returned my feelings. We got merried. She was a loner too, but moer of a thinker. She just did not like people, and that was her choiche. We moved to southern part of europe, and have lived here ever since. I have had my ups and downs, but sunshine has stood by me. It was love, she said. And now she is gone. Just a few weeks ago, she left me. She have moved to her hometown. I have never felt more alone then now. We where such a match. I was there for her, and she for me. We practiced our art, and made that became our income. We had each other and the art. Things where great. We tired for years to have children. At last they found out it was me. We have talked and talked about the subject. I have said we could adopt, or we could try in a lab. Well we waited cause it could come naturally. If I just had pushed harder, maybe things would have been better. We could have fixed it in a lab. Anyway, the meaning of life was gone when she left me, and I stopped doing the most of things. I belive the only things I been doing since she left is drinking, smoking and sleeping. And two or three showers. I have a black whole in me, that just sucks the life out of me. I feel so alone and so small against the world. Man was not meant to be alone. A few weeks ago I read on the net about a suicide in my old country. That was when it became clear to me what to do. I could not take the pain anymore. I have had these thoughts on and off since the age of 9, so nothing new, but this time it was for real. When easter in my old country started, people would meet with family and friends. I was here, in another country without family and freinds I do not have. My wife and I always made a big deal about the holidays. Spent them togheter. Not anymore. Loneliness.Pain. I have messed up my life so bad, and I can never have the years back. It is too late to make something out of life. Then I read your site. You showed me there are more then just my pain that matters. I had a half an hour conversation with the therapist, and we decided I will meet on monday, 9 o'clock. Maybe some pills can take the pain away.

Name:: sunceria wooten
Email:: sunceria@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: April14,2006

Message

I read your story, and I feel like I can identify with your journey, because it is so similar to my own. You are a brave woman.

Name:: Mary Price
Email:: dominonutz@sbcglobal.net
Web_site:
Date:: 04/20.06

Message

Kristi, I just wanted you to know that you are now in my prayers. I too have ILC. I have been in remission for 4 years and started suffering severe headaches (aping cluster heataches to a T) about 2 1/12 months ago. They did an MRI, MRA and full body bone scan and found nothing. Medicines typically used to treat migraine and cluster headaches did nothing to releave my pain and finally my Neurologist did a spinal tap and had the spinal fluid tested. They found ILC cells in the fluid and I had my first chemo This past Tues. They have to admminister it through a spinal tap which is very painful. My onc says that if I tolerate the treatment well (1 weekly treatment for 12 weeks) after the first couple he will have a neuro-surgeon put in a shunt so administering the treatments will be less painful and reduce the risk of infection. I will have yet another CT scan Mon to make sure that it has not spread to any other part of my body. Please pray for me that it hasn't. I will continue to pray for you. God Bless you and yours In Sisterly love Mary

Name:: Danah J
Email:: djbooboo@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: april24-06

Message

WOW. im IN LOVE with ur work so powerful! what a great inspiration.. especially that ur a female artist!...WOOOW seriously amazing work!

Name:: Finn Victor
Email:: fvw@a-pro-pos.no
Web_site:
Date:: 2.5.06

Message

Kjære Kirsti Marie og jeg veksler mellom 1m snø på hytta og dårlig samvittighet fordi vi ikke har gjort unna "våronna" hjemme på Selsbakk. Denne tida er den fineste og mest fasinerende delen av året i Norge. Startet volleyballtreningen sist uke - veteranNM om 2 uker forståss. Gutta på laget kommenterte at min opptreden var et sikkert vårtegn og lurte på om det var hvit- eller blåveisen som forårsaket min iver. Fra tidligere 11 mnd trening i året 4 dager i uka er det nå 1 mnd og 1 dag. Akk ja - iver og spenst er begge redusert. Ser nå fram til å treffe deg og se området du bor i (kommer til Sør-Frankrike 30.mai). Vi snakkes min venn. klem finn victor

Name:: Mary Williams
Email:: mary@williams99.demon.co.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 8.05.06

Message

Hi Kirsti. I had a diagnosis of invasive lobular carcinoma, Stage 2, in January and have just finished radiotherapy. I am on arimidex and being post menopausal have not had too many side effects - so far. I was offered chemo, but as it would only offer a two percent benefit I gave it a miss. You maybe know about this, but there are some clinical trials in the States for intravenous vitamin C which look very promising. The trials are free, you just have to get there. Cancer cells are poisoned by V.C and it has none of the side effects of traditional chemo. I've radically changed my diet (given up dairy products, eat soya, drink green tea etc) and lifestyle and got rid of stuff which was dragging me down - work, family problems and negative people - and feel unreasonably optimistic. You are clearly a woman who lives one day at a time, fully, and your painting must be a huge support. I write poetry and self help books and it's a good outlet for the uncensored terror/despair/pain. People do come back from the edge, and people do die. All we can do is live fully and love and receive love as richly as we are able. I have pasted in a poem which might make you smile: THE LITTLE WORD ‘POP’ ‘Just pop your things off and pop up on the couch,’ He said. ‘I ought to examine you. I’ll just pop out and ask the nurse To join us.’ (That’ll be fun, I thought.) And so I dutifully popped. ‘Pop your bag on the chair, dear, and lie down. Try to relax,’ he said. (Patronising git). Curtains. Enter the nurse, Stage Left. So I lay with my tender breast between his hands (it just popped out) and the nurse looking on and the bleeper buzzing and the monitor winking and they said ‘We’ll need you to pop up to the hospital to get this checked.’ So I popped up there, dutifully, as before. And guess what? It’s somewhat serious. So next time they say ‘pop’ I’m off, popping my clogs, running for my life. Love and hugs, Mary

Name:: sherry
Email:
Web_site:
Date:: 05/22/06

Message

I wanted to thank you for your writing about your brother. I saw myself in almost every word. Each of my three brothers committed suicide at different stages of life. I had to choose whether life or death. The pain and loss seemed and still at times seems overwhelming. Oh Kristi, I miss them so much, and I feel so guilty for being. My family that was holding together by threads finally fell apart with the last death three years ago. Got the great husband and wondergful daughter-someone told me once that I had everything that wanted in life and how jealous she was. All I could do is smile and say, well maybe not everything. Thank you for echoing what screams from my soul, thank you for being and reminding me that I am not alone in my experience. I truly thought no one understood. You give me hope. S

Name:: Regina Hathorne
Email:: rhathorne@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: May 23, 2006

Message

Hang in there. Sounds like you've been to hell and back. I was diagnosed Stage IV breast cancer in September 2005, 10 months free and clear from Stage II in 2004. I get the results of my PET scan May 31. Fingers crossed. It spread to my lungs, bones, my mastectomy site, but 16 rounds of chemo (finished in February) knocked it back a bit. I guess Stage IV is just a chronic manageable illness until the end, huh? I enjoyed your website, sorry for all your suffering. Hang in there. Yours in health, Regina Hathorne

Name:
Email:
Web_site:
Date:: May 30/06

Message

Dear Kirsti, Please check this website: www.dr-gonzalez.com. I had advanced breast cancer and followed Dr. Gonzalez' treatment. I am alive four years later after a recurrence.

Name:: Wanda
Email:: RiverYoda@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 6-1-06

Message

Thank you for sharing your saga. I too had ILC that went undiagnosised for 2 1/2 years. I wanted a double mastectomy but my oncologist told me I was being hysterical & need a psychriatist. I have since changed oncologist but it has been a long long journey. I too take aromasin & I feel like a 90 year old woman (I am only 56). You site gives me hope.

Name:: Wanda
Email:: RiverYoda@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 6-1-06

Message

Name:: kathrine ødegård
Email:: kathrine.odegard@gmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 01.06.06

Message

Min "lillesøster"s operasjon gikk veldig godt. Var litt bekymret den føste kvelden, da hun virket nesten likegyldig til alt, både mat, væske og selskap. Men da min mor kom hjem etter jobb dagen etter var det nok en gang en liten propell som kom løpende ut av kjøkkenet. Akkurat nå er hun på ferie hos meg da mine foreldre skulle reise denne helgen. Veldig koselig med lillesøsterbesøk. Følger fortsatt siden din, er innom ihvertfall et par-tre ganger i uken. Stå på!!! Kathrine

Name:: Toba
Email:: toba.shuman@tarion.com
Web_site:
Date:: 20060608

Message

I am Toba, I live in Toronto Canada. While one day looking for information on this form of Breast Cancer I came across your story. I have a very close friend recently diagnosed with this cancer so i was looking for any information. I pray for you and wish for good health. It is hard to know what to say . I try to be there for my friend. she knows I care and love her and support her. I wonder how you are feeling now. Have u been given any new drugs? Your artwork is beautiful! absoolutely magnficent! Please know your story moved me and you are in my thoughts. Toba

Name:: Toni K.
Email:: tmk184400@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: 06/25/06

Message

Kristi, I just read your story. Very brave for you to post it and I hope theraputic as well. I live in central New York State. I am 36 yrs old and Stage 4 as well. I used to post on the WebMD board when I was first diagnosed 2 years ago. They helped me cope with the mastectomy(s), recon w/ saline implants, and chemo. I also was node neg. and her 2 neg, ER/PR +. I did a complete hysterectomy and took the arimidex for a year. Then mets showed up. During this time, I watched many good and young women on the board die. I know I will join them soon. And can't bring myself to post online anymore because I don't want to depress anyone else. I understand your pain and loss. I am sorry for us both. We are much too young to have to be dealing with this. I also know the loneliness that goes along with being terminally ill in a world of healthy people enjoying life. I hope that you can count me as a friend and email me if you ever want to talk. I am doing xeloda and avastin on top of aromasin and just got the news that it isn't working either. PET scan tomorrow. I pray for a little good news for once. I hope you find some too. May God Bless and Keep you... Toni

Name:: Joanne
Email:: jo@crow26.fsnet.co.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 30/06/06

Message

Hi Kirsti I am doing my own personal research into the causes of breast cancer and believe the contraceptive pill to be responsible for a huge number of cases but the dangers are not widely known. There are studies which cite HRT as a cause for a lot of new cases of lobular cancer which contains basically the same ingredients as the combined pill. Just wondered what you believe to be the causative factor of your own cancer. I also attach a couple of links about breast cancer and the pill. Hope they help others avoid this deadly disease. http://www.tuberose.com/Oral_Contraceptives.html http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?sec=health&res=950DEED81F31F935A35756C0A96F948260 If the second link does not work do a search under the description "the pill" for stories on 6th May 1989. The title is "New Link Between Pill and Cancer Reported". Looking forward to your reply. Joanne

Name:: Lisa Hohenstein
Email:: tedlisah@insightbb.com
Web_site:
Date:: June 30, 2006

Message

Hi Kirsti, We at the Friend to Friend WebMD message board have missed you and want to hear from you very much... please visit the board to let us know how you are. We need to hear from you. You are very important to us and look forward to your posts. I pray you are doing well. Blessings, Lisa

Name:: J D BRASWELL
Email:: jd.braswell@sbcglobal.net
Web_site:: WebMd bc friend to friend
Date:: 7/7/2006

Message

Hello my friend Kirsti, I have re-read your story and felt I needed to respond. Your are much like my Mildred, her ca15-3 cancer markers followed much the same train as yours. Hers went from 182 in Spring 2005 to the middle 30's and the began to rise as her cancer spread to right shoulder and eventually to her right side of her brain. She was in Hospice for 10 weeks until she passed away on April 29,2006. Your are in my thoughts daily and hope you are finding health and help more available. \\Your bc friend. J.D.B.

Name:: Carol Toth
Email:: carolstoth@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: 9 July 2006

Message

Dear Kirsti, I'm crying and breathing deeply to try to calm my own hysteria. I, too had ILC that was dismissed as nothing. "Go home and forget about it," was the advice of the doctor who read the mammogram and sonogram. Luckily I decided to see a surgeon and I'm now 6 years, "cancer free." But like you, I have always been stoic and uncomplaining but feel your same white fear. Last week I think I discovered another tiny lump in the other breast. Will I ever be free of this monster that started out as such an insignificant lump? Your site is so well done and such compelling reading. Add my prayers for you to your thousands of others. By the way, I used to live in France and love the country so much. A sister sufferer, Carol

Name:: Maura
Email:: Mobeemaster@gmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 7/9/2006

Message

Kirsti- What a fabulous site. You are a very special lady. I continue to pray for your healing. Yoru friend "across the pond" Maura

Name:: mireille mathys
Email:: mireille.mathys@gmail.-com
Web_site:: www.miroir-m.ch
Date:: 12 juillet 2006

Message

Bonjour Je viens de voir votre site web... je suis en pleine creation d'un site pour une association en suisse, appellee "marraines cancer du sein", moi-même opérée en 2004. Je désire faire figurer quelques'une de vos photos sur notre site, m'authoriser-vous, sinon, je mettrai un lien... Bravo, continuez ! C'est très parlant et l'émotion se ressent..... Bien cordialement, Mireille

Name:: Stacey
Email:: StaceyQ7@ufl.edu
Web_site:
Date:: 7/20/06

Message

Hi Kirsti, I was very moved by your artwork and so happy to know that this theme is being expressed in contemporary art. I feel like I have been constantly bombarded with reminders of my mortality through various relatives and friends that have been going through cancer, specifically breast cancer. Personally, I am only 22 years old, but have had my own share of cancer scares after continuous biopsies and ultimate surgery to get rid of rapidly developing abnormal skin cancer cells. After these personal experiences and an inquisitive mind, I have developed a strong interest in self expression of one's illness in art. It was only today that I saw your website, but was so intrigued by your work that I knew I wanted to contact you immediately. I have a close tie to breast cancer as two of my relatives have undergone mastectomies and I am likely to carry the BRCA gene as well. At this point in time, I am trying to do research to find out more about this devastating possibility in my future. I am constantly trying to find a way to incorporate this theme into my multiple art history course papers in order to develop an understanding for myself as well as be able to devote more time to it. In this way, my Body Art History class this semester allows me to focus on the "Relationship between Body Image and Mastectomies". I can see from your website that answering posts would be a full-time job in itself. However, if you do have the time to share your opinion on your experiences between presenting art and coping with the change of body image, I would be greatly appreciative. Please feel free to email me at StaceyQ7@ufl.edu Thanks so much for listening. Stacey

Name:: Kirsti
Email:: mail@kirstio.com
Web_site:
Date:: August 2006

Message

Please, please, let the spammers leave this site alone.

Name:: Nicole
Email:: Braegger
Web_site:: nicolebraegger@hotmail.com
Date:: August 23, 2006

Message

I am a hospice nurse in southern California. I read your story from start to finish to remind myself of what some of my patients may go through before they become my patient. It is a common story of mistrust between doctor and patient. There were multiple symptoms and reports from a patient being overlooked by the person with the expertise, the doctor. It breaks my heart to hear patients gut feelings of something being wrong with them overlooked by a medical professional. Sometimes gut feelings are all we have to go on when tests (mammograms, ultrasounds) fail us. I pray that you can find some peace in your life and a sense of wellbeing at some point. It sounds like you are truly a fighter, a strong women. God Bless, Nicole

Name:: Betty
Email:: reikiwarmhands@msn.com
Web_site:: http://reikiwarmhands@msn.com
Date:: August 24, 2006

Message

Kirsti, We have talked on the Web MD board. I read every day, so have seen the latest. Just want to let you know your site and artwork are beautiful...as are you. I understand if you do not wish to reply, but want to let you know you are in my thoughts and heart and that you will be so very missed from the board if you do indeed chose to absent yourself. It was so good to see you post again the other day and I hope you will continue to share and enjoy the support found there. Please know good energy is streaming your way across The Pond and that I hope you have days of beauty, peace, love, strength, and laughter. You are a lovely soul and...you are not alone. Sending you sisterly love and gentle hugs, Betty

Name:: laura petersen
Email:: laura@friendsinthecountry.com
Web_site:
Date:: 08.30.06

Message

kirsti, wishes for comfort and strength thru this round of chemo. may taxol stop those beast cells and make them run away. i love your new piece, as always...just incredible! healing thoughts from california to you! laura petersen

Name:: Beatrice
Email:: arandilme@fastwebnet.it
Web_site:
Date:: 09-04-2006

Message

Wonderful!!!!!! The best picture of Arwen I've ever seen! Wonderful! Bye Beatrice

Name:: Beatrice
Email:: arandilme@fastwebnet.it
Web_site:
Date:: 09-04-2006

Message

Wonderful!!!!!! The best picture of Arwen I've ever seen! Wonderful! Bye Beatrice

Name:: Ryan
Email:: rfus007@gmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 9-14

Message

Hey, I lost my twin brother at 20. I lost someone to suicide after. I have no idea about your loss and current battle, but I can reflect upon something I was given. Regards, Ryan

Name:: Inga
Email:
Web_site:
Date:

Message

Name:: Inga Dalsegg
Email:: ingadalsegg@hotmail.com
Web_site:: www.storeord.no/inga
Date:: 17.09.2006

Message

Kjære Kirsti Nå er det lenge siden du har hørt fra meg, jeg har sittet og sett på siden din lenge nå i dag, jeg ble så utrolig trist da jeg leste at kreften har kommet tilbake igjen. Jeg føler virkelig med deg, og tenker mye på deg. Du er tøff Kirsti! Du kjemper i mot, heldigvis, og er utrolig sterk. Som vi har snakket om før er humor en viktig faktor når livet er tungt, og det har du heldigvis mye av. Du imponerer stort, og inspirerer mange. Det ser så utrolig flott ut der du bor i Frankrike nå, blir litt misunnelig på det! Etter alle årene i England bor jeg nå i Norge på 3. året, men tviler på at jeg blir her livet ut, er ikke noe glad i klimaet må jeg si, snø er bedre på foto enn i virkeligheten spør du meg. Kunsten din er fremdeles flott ser jeg! Tre av bildene dine fengsler meg virkelig, jeg blir alltid glad når jeg finner bilder som gjør at jeg bare må gå tilbake og se på de igjen og igjen og igjen…Det er som om det er noe magisk over de, noe som gjør at jeg ikke får til å gi helt slipp på de, har åpnet og lukket de tre vinduene talløse ganger nå… Det er slike ting vi som kunstnere jobber for å oppnå mener jeg, den effekten der på andre mennesker, og lage bilder som fanger de slik at de ikke greier å bare gå forbi de, men må stoppe og se og se, ikke greier helt å komme seg forbi. Hver gang jeg ser det på utstillingene mine vet jeg at jeg har oppnådd noe fantastisk, at jeg har laget noe som rører et annet menneske på den måten, det er en veldig spesiell følelse, det å kunne gi et annet menneske en slik opplevelse. Skal sende deg noen bilder av de nyeste maleriene mine, websiden min har ikke blitt oppdatert på en evighet, så mailer de til deg i stedet, så du kan ta en titt! Tenker på deg, ønsker deg alt godt. Hilsen Inga

Name:: Ninne
Email:: nifly@online.no
Web_site:: ninnesblogg.blogdrive.com
Date:: 17.09.2006

Message

Kjære Kirsti! Innom for å lese litt i dagboken din, og ser at det er litt stille her om dagen! Jeg tenker på deg og håper alt er sånn nogenlunde bra au grand Chateau charmant.... Her lakker og lir det mot høst, for meg betyr det soppturer i skogen, strikketøy i sofakroken og stearinlys på bordet..... Koselig i grunnen! Jeg sender en av de litt ekstra gode klemmene til deg, - fra meg!

Name:: giuseppe
Email:: gmastromatteo@gmail.com
Web_site:: www.giuseppemastromatteo.com
Date:: 140906

Message

Fantastic! I love your paint about joni mitchell. Really beutiful. I paint also, but starting from digital photo and then I finish with digital treatment. Let me know if you like mine. Compliments again for your work, really interesting. Ciao gius

Name:: laura petersen
Email:: laura@friendsinthecountry.com
Web_site:
Date:: 9.17.06

Message

kirsti, i have heard of chemo markers going haywire with the treatment initially... maybe it is stressful having them done too often... every three months, every six months? how do you feel...is your treatmentworking for you? i surely hope this is how you feel... i can have the fantasy that we are celebrating your remission at the new year all over the world, can't i... as always thank you to what you have given many sisters that face a similar plight. savor the change in seasons, it is lovely and all around us! i see a picture of you in a fetal position with autumn leaves as your nest...i hope you are energized by this seAson... WARM THOUGHTS, HEALING ONES CIRLE THE GLOBE

Name:: Gya
Email:: gry05@online.no
Web_site:
Date:

Message

Du sterke kvinne, vi er flere :) Stå på............ Takk for å ta del i din krefsykdom, jeg håper også helbredelse da :) Mental positiv tankegang er bra ,men jeg ville hatt den i norske friske lufta i fjellet jeg elsker og ikke i varmen i Sør Frankrike.. da klikker det..men ser man hva steder og folk betyr... Har barndommen fra gamle Jugoslavia da... Heia fjellet og rehab :) Takk og sigg smoke fra en medsøster

Name:: Rita Gacon
Email:: rita.gacon@mtlworld.com
Web_site:: surfing for info on Lobular cancer.
Date:: 23rd September 2006

Message

I have just read your site, and want you to know that I admire you greatly. I was diagnosed with Invasive Lobular Cancer in October 2003. Like you,why did the hospitals and breast screening units not make more effort to find mine, too? (A neoplasm is noted in my records in 1993 and 1994!!) I have had 6 mammos in 13 years, and regular attendance at what we call in the U.K., Well Woman Clinics, and every time I was told my lumps were "Hormal". Did you know that Lobular in situ usually takes 15 years to become invasive??. I am so angry. I was over the menopause aged 63, and mine was stage 2 grade 2., no node invasion, so no chemo. I was misinformed about the extent of the in situ and duct spread and the surgeon performed a quadrantectomy on me without my knowledge and consent and did a full node clearance, when he said he would do a level 1 node dissection. Am I angry!!!!!. As I have a neurological disease, I am still in pain, and also was NOT fully examined on the other breast. I bought a computer, obtained my medical records and researched. I found my other cancers in my right breast that all the oncologists had missed also before, and since receiving treatment. Luckily, the Tubular/Cribriform invasive, plus lobular hyperplasia and Ductal Comedo's in situ (two) had not, yet again, gone to my lymph nodes. I settled for wide local excision, and re-excision, as I could not re-live the very severe breast pain again, and Tamoxifen, Arimidex and now Femara are causing me so much pain I have to take Tramadol. It is bliss to be pain free for a few hours per day. Tramadol is a serotonin reuptake inhibitor, and I must say I do feel more calm on just one dose when I start my day. Two doses and I cannot sleep. Hope I have'nt bored you with my story, but I am so angry I have complained to The Health Care Commission about my treatment in two hospitals, and all I can say about oncology docs, and from what I have learnt from the web (280,000 stored published papers - read twice) - my opinion of the UK docs is that they are a bunch of amateurs.I found my cancers, and it is only with diligence that I am lucky they have not spread to the nodes. I am being very wary now, and trust only myself. Next step is to get them to perform a full body PET scan- it costs so much, but I have pain under my rib cage. With lobular, it is accepted that there is 20-30% chance of cancers being in the opposite breast especially as lobular is slow growing and bi-lateral. The last three years have been hell, and I did not even have chemo!!! Good Luck to you. Come back, if you want to have a jolly good long confidential moan, to someone who really understands. Be aware, as you have been, and I hope the sun and quiet of the French countryside is helping you retain your equilibrium. Take Care of yourself, as I believe nobody else will. I am very disillusioned!!! Kindest regards Rita Gacon U.K.

Name:: jennifer
Email:: jen4me40@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 9-25-06

Message

i to have inasie lobular carcamonia, i had a mammgramm in feb of 2006 which was normal and a obgyn exam same month with a physical breast exam again normal. 2 months later after a shower i discovered a ery large lump on my left breast. since previous results were normal my primary care put me on antibotics and sent me for ultra scan. 10 days of antibotics did nothing, therefore a fine needle biopsy was done, and discovered the cancer. I had a double mastacomy, because of the high cross over rate of this cancer on may 24. 2006. i am currently undergoing chemo every 2 weeks, and my last one is this week then i get a break and start radaion for 6wks eery day. so far chemo hasnt been as bad as i had imagined, i havent been sick at all just hair loss which i can live with, im a little nervous about radaion but thats a bridge ill cross when i get there. im 45 on october 13, and do not plan on reconstruction, i dont want any more surgeries. i work from home and my husband is very understanding and concerned and doesnt care if i have breasts or not as long as im healthy. my onocoliist has stated to me that he doesnt feel any further scans are necessary, ha he wants me to ge on with my life and not live from scan to scan, im not sure about this, i had a pet scan prior to chemo and although my surgery found 2 lymp nodes bad the pet showed no further spreading of the cancer. i think i will request an additional scan after completion of radaion, just to let me know where i stand. i hope things are better for u by the time u recieve this, i will be thinking of u and praying. good luck and your friend was right this to will pass, thats a saying i live by daily.

Name:: stephanie wiffen
Email:: bwiffen@5carolina.freeserve.co.uk
Web_site:: www.kirstio.com
Date:: 26.09.06

Message

i really admire your work, i am working on an art gcse and i am using your work as indpiration for good ideas, we are making spirit vessel and i have chosen cancer. i especially love your picture called: i dream balck butterflies. i think it is beautiful and it reminds me of my nan- joan elizabeth beale. she was gentle and kind but tragically died of cancer, she is greatly missed. i think that if she could have seen your work it would have cheered her up during the hard experience that she went through whilst treationgher brain tumours and lung cancer. yours truly stephanie wiffen (young artist aged 14)

Name:: mel b
Email:: pmjcbarron@aol.com
Web_site:
Date:: 03.10.06

Message

Thank you so much - I needed some pictures of illuminated letters for my class to use as starting point. Yours are lovely and am sure they will inspire.

Name:: Alisa Oleck
Email:: alisaoleck@bellsouth.net
Web_site:
Date:

Message

I keep reading your story. I amm so frightened by it . I f you can,please email me back. Alisa

Name:: Cecilia
Email:: cecilia.schwarz@gmail.com
Web_site:: None
Date:: 10-8-06

Message

Dear Kristie; I came across your story, while trying to find some poetry regarding loss of a friend to breast cancer. Your life seems so parrallel to what my mother went through for 17 years. I am also a Scandinavian. Born and raised in Sweden, currently living in the US. When I was eleven years old, my mother was 35 and got diagnosed with cancer. She had a lumpectomy, followed by radiation. After 7 years, she was afflicted by another occurance in the same breast. Promptly, a mastectomy was performed and Tamoixfen therapy was initilized. In early 2002, mom requested to be seen for a palpable lump she was concerned with, After multiple test and reassurance from medical doctors she was told "not to worry" it is nothing of concern....Little over one year thereafter, my aunt, (her sister) and my mom came to celebrate the upcoming arrival of my daughter at a Baby Shower. It was at this time I noticed the lump, which had become very large. Her sister was appaled as well, and she insisted upon their return they would immediately seek another surgeon and demand a removal. On the same day I was hospitalized due to complications of my prenancy, I was informed of the results of my mothers third upcoming battle with breast cancer. Indeed, the finding were +! Within a few days, a radical mastectomy was performed. With these news, unfortunately, she was not able to come for the birth of her grand-daughter. I was devestated beyong imagination. With documentation in her hand, indicating that she had recieved the "clean bill of health" 14 months earlier, my mother's cancer was inevitable. I was delighted to finally see her, my child was 10 weeks old when my dad brought her over for a three-week visit and stay, because we knew that would be therapy for her ailing soul. It was heart-wrenching to see my mother without hair. I did not want her to see my despair and fear for what was going to come. Her attitude and relentless drive for battling the disease was incredible. Exactly, two years later, in April of 2005 we received the order that turned my life upside down. For a few months, during the winter and spring, she had mentioned some minor discomfort in her abdomen. Her GP prescribed some meds to ease the pain, suggestive of an ulcer or gastritis. It was Mother's Day, May 8th 2005, she came to visit my daughter and I for three lovely weeks. I had just taken a new assignement professionally, and her visit was intended to help us out. I was uncomfortable returning to work, having my mother with a 2 year old at home, although her symptoms were not keeping her bedridden. I insisted and brought my mother to the ER on Sunday evening, with hopes to get some clear text in front of me. Being in the medical field, I was consulting others to get some conclusive answers. After blood test and CT scans, the physician confirmed the unexpected. After carefully taking her prior history into account, the findings were concerning but non-specific due to his areas of expertise. Our thoughts were quickly switched from possibly having gallstones to having to face metastatic breast cancer. My mom and I were speechless as we started to cry in fear of what we were going to face. I demanded to see the CT scan, I needed to prepare myself for what I had ahead of me. Within a short period of time, her oncologist that she had consulted over the last couple of years was contacted and informed. We quickly gathered up all of our paperwork and test results behore driving to the Medical Center, downtown. The following day, mutiple teams of physicians were didactically going through her history, while I was frantically pulling information from everywhere to confirm and demand the most comprehensive care available. We were very hopeful to receive path results contradicting the physical and radiological test, but to our misfortune, the liver biopsy confirmed metastatic breast cancer as a primary origin...I suppose, if cancer was the outcome, we were hoping to face another option for the chance of success. Within three short months of radiation to her head, one round of chemotherapy, my 52-year old mother lost her battle to this disease in August of 2005. I truly believe she would still be living, had she received more aggressive medical care after being ignored and gently patted on the shoulder for over 14 months. The aloofness to treat a patient with a history of breast cancer, twice over 15 years in that fashion is unacceptable. And just like yourself, gastritis treated with a pill and a glass of water is not sufficient. I cannot describe the deep disappointment I have for the inattention and unwillingness to possibly provide the best care available. I am currently employed in the field of diagnostics, specifically for breast cancer. I am in shock to tell you what I witness taking place, considering what is available in terms of advanced technology but is not being utilized. I hope to hear from you soon, your website deeply touched my heart as I felt your experiences were identical to my mother, as well as being from Scandinavia!. Please let me know if there is anything I can provide to reassure you. You have an amazing site, I am so glad I came across your "dagbok" as we say in Swedish!

Name:: Nina Charlotte Berget
Email:: nenyasilver@hotmail.com
Web_site:: http://nenyasilver.artistportfolio.net/
Date:: 10 oktober 2006

Message

Hei :-) Du lager nydelig kunst, helt fantastisk! Jeg beundrer deg. Det er sterkt å lese din dagbok, jeg håper det går bra med deg! Stå på og lykke til-klemmer fra Nina Charlotte

Name:: Pat Tewalt
Email:: mistertee4@aol.com
Web_site:: none
Date:: 10/10/2006

Message

I just read your story..Thank you..I was just diagnosed with invasive lobular cancer. I talked to my Surgeon last Thursday, and was told it was a truly personal decision as to what I wanted done. I could have a lumpectomy or a mastectomy, either should be ok..I chose to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction during surgery. My Doc told me they would be taking a lot of tissue out of my breast, if I had the lumpectomy, as the lobular is always larger that the symptoms show. I felt, maybe I was going overboard a little, until I read your story, now I know I made the right decision..I meet with my Plastic Surgeon this Thursday (Oct 12,2006)to see what options I will have as to reconstruction, then I will be scheduled for surgery. Thank you for the courage to tell others about your ordeal..Cancer is a Bitch. God bless you. Pat P.S. I had cancer in my right breast in 2000 and had a lumpectomy for ductal cancer, I passed my 5 years on that one, and was told the lobular is a completely different cancer and that, that was a good thing.

Name:: Pat Tewalt
Email:: mistertee4@aol.com
Web_site:: none
Date:: 10/10/2006

Message

Name:: Angela
Email:: vodlady@gmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 10-10-2006

Message

Bonjour - Thank you for sharing your story. Reading your journey is a humbling experience. I am truly in awe at your ability to be so courageous given your arduous medical treatments. My sister-in-law was recently diagnosed with ILC. Unfortunately there does not appear to be much info here in the US on the subject. Even the ACS (American Cancer Society) had to dedicate a researcher to help us. Your site came up under Google's search results, and I'm glad that it did. You are an amazing woman. I am blessed to have come across your pages and I wish you all the best in your journey. Bonne Chance -

Name:: Inga Dalsegg
Email:: art@ingadalsegg.com
Web_site:: www.ingadalsegg.com
Date:: 13.10.2006

Message

Hei Kirsti, Tenker på deg titt og ofte, og titter innom siden din jevnlig. Du imponerer meg hele tiden, og rører meg til tårer… Bildene dine er også så sterke, de sier så mye. Her er et av diktene jeg leste i gravferden til Elin, tvillingsøsteren min, vi hadde avtalt det på forhånd, et dikt jeg stadig kommer tilbake til, synes det er så sant, så sant. Life is a gift that must be given back And joy should arise from its possession It’s too damned short, and that’s a fact. Hard to accept this earthly procession To final darkness is a journey done, Circle completed, work of art sublime, A sweet melodic rhyme, a battle won. Klem fra Inga

Name:: Susan Shinn
Email:: seshinn@bellsouth.net
Web_site:
Date:: 20 October 2006

Message

Hello Kirsti, I am a nurse practitioner specializing in breast & gynecologic cancer. In searching the web for resources on artwork by women with cancer, your website has the most powerful images I have seen. Thank you for your wonderful work! From the messages it appears that your journey has been and is very hard; I wish you peace and ease. I wonder how you would feel about me using one of your images (crediting you and giving your website, of course) to illustrate a talk I am giving to other oncology nurses? I hope it is acceptable to you. I'd like to use "Black butterflies." Again, I thank you for sharing your experience so beautifully with the world. Susan

Name:: Cynthia
Email:
Web_site:
Date:: 21.10.06

Message

Your work is fantastic. Love 'Carneval'. I have found inspiration after visiting your site. Have a nice day :-)

Name:: Martha Elder Domont
Email:: martha@pvac.com
Web_site:
Date:: Oct 22 2006

Message

I recently came across your story as I was searching for ILC with bone mets and your site came up. I can not believe how much our cancer stories line up. I just found mine last year 2005 in Feb and am still going through it. I also had thyroid nodules which ironically were growing on a dead thyroid. It had died after my second son was born in 1977. I also had preadjuvant chemo as my ILC was about 8-9 cm,also indianfile,and not detected until my modest right breast doubled in size almost overnight. I also had a bi-lateral mastectomy as I didn't want to deal with the uncertainty again in the left breast. In Feb of 2006 I had my ovaries removed, I had my uterus removed years ago, and was becoming an androgenous woman as I joked about my new physical condition. This week I am getting a bone scan because one of my lumbar vertabrae and one rib are hurting. I stopped my Aromasin after I was unable to walk due to the excruciating pain in my joints from it. However, after reading your story I am thinking of trying another med maybe just tamoxafin. I know that ILC is incredibly incideous as it doesn't show itself before it has grown alot. What a bitch and I too have gained about 18 pounds also and I eat minimally...I too lost a sister to BC in 2000 and another from paraplegic complications the same week I too was diagnosed with BC. Anyway, I love your art and the expression of your emotions. Thank you for sharing and creating beauty in the face of such trials. I will check back periodically and find out how you are as you progress in our disease. Keep up the great work, emotionally, physically and artistically, Martha Domont

Name:: Linda
Email:: l_stower@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 24.10.2006

Message

Hei! Kom over siden din da jeg søkte på bilder av dosetter (research til et prosjekt jeg driver med). Bildene dine er helt fantastiske! Sitter gjerne modell for et portrett ;) Ha en strålende dag!! mvh Linda. design student i norge

Name:: Bodil Rød
Email:: bodil.rod@auraavis.no
Web_site:
Date:

Message

Hei! Har prøvd å ringe deg, men fikk ikke svar. Jeg jobber i Aura Avis og skal skrive litt om høstutstillingen i Sunndal kunstlag. Hadde vært koselig med et lite intervju med deg. Skal til Astrid Grødal om en stund og lage en annen sak med samma tema. Mobnr. mitt er 4799161190. Kan du sende meg en melding om når jeg kan ringe deg. Drar til Astrid ca kl. 13.30 og er tilbake klokken 15.30. mvh Bodil Rød

Name:: gail miller
Email:: mozartlover@adelphia.net
Web_site:: webmed friend to friend
Date:: Oct 31,2006

Message

Dearest Kristi, I always read your posts with interest. Your magazine cover is just beautiful. There is so much emotion in your illustration. I think of you often and hope that life is getting better for you. I know how hard you are fighting. It is so important to feel supported while you are going through this battle. When I was going through treatment, I was most fortunate, that my family was there every step of the way. If you are not as fortunate to have loved ones around you, please know how much we all care about you on this side of the ocean. You are loved and cared about , so please keep fighting hard. With love and best regards, Gail

Name:: Donna Naranjo
Email:: donnamnaranjo@yahoo.com
Web_site:
Date:: November 8, 2006

Message

I emphathize with you. I came across your website researching for my friend who has just been diagnosed with breast cancer. There is so much information out there and it is really scary until you must dive in. I hope you are feeling better, your story was very heartwrenching to me. You are a strong person and it shows in your writing. I will pray that you have a speedy recovery. God bless you and keep strong. Donna

Name:: Jacqueline Blair
Email:: jablair@cwjamaica.com
Web_site:
Date:: November 10, 2006

Message

Your story is an inspiration. I just want to say continue to fight this monster and live life. You are a true survivor.

Name:: Olwen
Email:: olwendixon@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: November 11th 2006

Message

I really like your site and your drawings. I wonder if you ever sell your art work? Thank you for letting me share your lovely work. I dont know how I found your site, it was just lucky! Olwen

Name:: Rachael67
Email:: billem55@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 11-15-06

Message

Hi Dear Kirsti! Although I've been to your site on previous occasions, I never took time just to tell you I was thinking of you...Jaydee reminded all of us today about the postings, so here I am!! You are in our minds and hearts so much, it's a wonder you don't feel our vibes!! And every time "Pinkie" is mentioned on the board, there is one person who rushes to our minds...Our MadameK!! Hope today is a little better for you...More blue-skies and sunshine just for you!! Blessings and miracles always! Rachael

Name:: Marie Meme1964
Email:: maries38@northnet.org
Web_site:
Date:: 11/15/2006

Message

WOW!!!!!! You do wonderful work. I am so glad I visited your site and hope that others do themselves the favor of experiencing your art. Thank you Marie

Name:: Valerie Coster
Email:: valcoster@tiscali.co.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 17.11.2006

Message

Hi Kirsti I met you ages ago with Jeremey & apparently you like my nose! I'm very flattered, never been too keen on it myself, anyway spoke Jes other day & said he'd seen you,so made me think of the day we had with you, I did enjoy meeting you, nothing really to say except I hope you are coping with all the crappy stuff!& most women would not look half as attractive as you with no hair! Guess just wanted to say hi, I like you & hope Jes will bring me & of course the dogs to visit you again next time, hopefully january, look after you All the best Valerie

Name:: ninnina
Email:
Web_site:
Date:: 29.11.06

Message

Måtte bare sende en hilsen til jeg.Var oppriktig talt litt bekymra over at du ikke hadde skrevet noe dagene før jeg sendte den første. Jeg har vært inne og sett etter oppdatering, og jeg forstår jo at det ikke akkurat er lett å finne inspirasjonen til å skrive når du venter på helsesjekk, og etterpå. Pluss alt det andre som følger med av begrensninger. Jeg føler meg litt dum når mine ønsker sikkert ligger langt unna hvordan du har det.. Synes du tar så nydelige bilder fra området og viser i dagboka, fikk lyst til å sende noen til deg for å vise at det ikke bare er sunndalinger i Frankrike,men også fransk innvandring i Sunndalen.Riktignok bare hester her da.. men likevel.. De kommer i fra et område mye lenger nord. Pent var det der også.. Men må ha litt hjelp for å få koblet bilder og et sprøtt epostprogram. Det er altfor varmt her også til å være i november, men sola skin fortsatt bare på toppene... STOR KLEM OG VARME TANKER TIL DEG! Hilsen ninnina

Name:: Joanne
Email:: jo@crow26.fsnet.co.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 8/12/06

Message

Hi Kirsti Congratulations on the reduction in your tumours in the lung and liver. That is really good news. I have come across a book which I think will be really helpful to you. It is called "With the Help of Our Friends from France: Stabilizing and Living with Advanced Breast Cancer" by Carol Silverander. ISBN: 0976831619 Here is a link to some reviews for it on Amazon. http://www.amazon.com/Help-Our-Friends-France-Stabilizing/dp/0976831619/sr=11-1/qid=1165584478/ref=sr_11_1/105-9129136-6102828 The author has been living with breast cancer and liver metastases for the last 7 years but has managed to stabilize her disease by using a new technique called 'endobiogenics' pioneered in Paris alongside her conventional treatment. It is basically about rebalancing the endocrine system which is often out of sync in disease conditions. The following link explains more about the concept: http://www.endobiogenics.com/ I really hope this is helpful to you and others who come across this page who are suffering from cancer.

Name:: Julie
Email:: jamikalis@verizon.net
Web_site:
Date:: 12-9-06

Message

Thanks for your wonderful story. I was diagnosed just yesterday with ILC. I am feeling so hopeless and panicked. Your story helped me to recognize that there is still live to be lived. Thanks and best wishes to you.

Name:: Eldbjørg
Email:: edoe@online.no
Web_site:
Date:: 11.12.06

Message

Heisan Kirsti. Det e mæ, ho du veit som dele bo med fetteren din i Oppdal.Endelig,men det satt langt inne, du skjønnerat ,av og til lider jeg av skrive vegring men nu er jeg i gang . Vi tenker på deg Magnar og jeg og sender en liten hilsen,vi skulle så gjerne vært nær deg og krammat om deg. Her på bruket går det sin vante gang, barnebarna vokser seg store de og, Audun 10år, Amanda 8år, Andrea 3år, Maybelle og Bent har bosatt seg her i Oppdal og det synes Mormor og Goffa er helt topp, jeg avslutter nu sender dere to mange gode tanker. Hisen oss to i Bjerkeveien 4b. PS. Bildene dine er utrolig fine du er en stor kunstner.

Name:: Janet from Montbrillais
Email:: janetelister@onetel.com
Web_site:: halstockonline.co.uk
Date:: Dec. 14th

Message

Hello, Kirstie, long lost friend. How are you? I have sent you a Christmas card by e-mail (the lazy way, I suppose) but I think they are more fun. I have happily settled back in England. I live in a small cottage in a small village with a small garden and wisteria over the door - that was my dream and here I am. A friend (female, alas) and I are going to stay with a friend in the Pyrenees and want to go over the bridge at Millau as part of our itinary. Then, as we trek back west I saw we would pass close to Mazerolle and would love to visit. It will probably be between March 19-24 when we reach you. I miss France very much. I do hope that you are happy. Do you ever come to England. You know there is always a welcome here for you.

Name:: sharon
Email:: shazaxt@tiscali.co.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 22 dec 2006

Message

hi just had to rply to this thread , i was diagnosed in 2003 with DCIS ,no node involvement ,clear margins and not hormone receptive so only need radiotherapy . after feelinf unwell for a year i was diagnosed with mets to almost right lobe of liver 4 months ago . i was then devastated to find out after testing original tumour tissue from breast that i am her2+. prognosis was not good but started on EC combination chemo every 3 weeks and seem to be responding well ,had last one today and scan in 3 weeks my rapid fall in tumour markes seems to indicate im responding well,so im hoping for more time than initially thought ,and im thankful but scared of false hope but i am realistic and keep my feet firmly on the ground.but i think like everyone we always have that hope inside of some sort of remission . just want to say i loved the site and pictures . love to all sharon

Name:: su scotting
Email:: susan.scotting@rpa.gsi.gov.uk
Web_site:
Date:: 22/12/06

Message

thanks for your wonderful images...i too am much inspired by the gudrun sjoden catalogue..and an autodidact artist, writer, songwriter &c....i thought your images were very inspiring and powerful and nourishing...Thankyou.

Name:: Robert Mellaerts
Email:: robert.mellaerts@telenet.be
Web_site:
Date:: 25 dec 2006

Message

Kirsti Nous te souhaitons un joyeux Noel, et une bonne année 2007. Maria et Robert (tes voisins belge)

Name:: Sahar
Email:: Saharza79@yahoo.com
Web_site:
Date:: December 26, 2006

Message

Dearest Kirsti, You artwork has touched my heart and inspired me to dig my acrylics out of the closet. You are a beautiful person and I am certain that your site has helped heal many hearts. My mother was diagnosed with infiltrating lobular carcinoma of the breast last week. We are not sure about the extent of involvement, but the mastectomy is in two days. I told her about your story and I think it inspired her. I am trying to be strong and many things in my life are now being placed into perspective. I will pray for you and for everyone else in the world who suffers from a pain or illness. You are so blessed with the ability to create art and expression. Your battle is your muse and you have brought something positive from all of this hardship. I have realized that with cancer, we must accept the diagnosis and fight with all of our might. It appears both a mental and physical struggle. I wish you only the best. I hope to some day meet you. Thank you, Sahar

Name:: Tracy Howerton
Email:: tracyh@fcsource.org
Web_site:
Date:: 1/2/2007

Message

Kirsti, I found your site through the Web MD F2F Board. My best friend was diagnosed recently with stage 4 BC w/mets to the liver. She is currently undergoing weekly chemotherapy. I just wanted you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers as you fight this disease. Tracy

Name:: Marguerite Treadwell
Email:: jjamt801@hotmail.com
Web_site:
Date:: 01/17/07

Message

I read your trial and pain with you cancer and believe you are a stronger person than I. I just wonder why alternative treatment is apparently not known as much as it should be. I have never had cancer and pray I never do but I know I would not go to a regular doctor that practices poisoning the whole body with chemo,etc. There are places and doctors who treat the whole person with all sort of alternative treatments without the awful side effects that might not only kill the cancer but the person also. These alternative treatments have been very successful in the person being completely healed of cancer. I pray that these alternative treatments will become more widely known and more people spared the terrible pain that conventional methods cause. I pray for your complete healing however God chooses.

Name:: Matteo Tognela
Email:: info@fantarte.com
Web_site:: www.fantarte.com
Date:: 16/01/2007

Message

Hi Kirsti, I've just discovered your wonderful bookmarks... impressive. Last time I visited your site I missed that section. I renew my compliments! best wishes, Matteo

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